Here's my issue: all the information we have on Satan theoretically comes from the Bible, right? I mean, that's where it all starts, laying out his role as a Heavenly prosecutor who chose sides poorly and got his Heavenly butt kicked to the proverbial curb by the man in charge. So far, so good, right?
I know there are several, subtly differing versions of the Bible floating around. There are new testaments and old testaments and last season's testaments and hey-don't-throw-that-out-I-can-still-get-some-use-out-of-it testaments. Throw in updated editions, add-ons by new and exciting prophets plus the various translations, and you could probably build a library out of the differing versions this one book, right?
Now the one thing I think they all have in common (and feel free to correct me, those among you who have more experience with this) is that there isn't a version where Satan or Lucifer or whatever he goes by is an okay dude. I have yet to come across the Biblical description of Satan as just some misunderstood kid who spoke out of turn and was made an example of, so now he messes with humanity, but really deep down he's okay. Maybe he just needs a hug, but it never happens because he's always on fire or whatever.
So the one source we have on the guy basically spells out that he's kind of a douche. Nonetheless, some group (presumably made up of people with similar, douche-like qualities) has decided not only that he's real but that he's worth worshiping. I could even understand it if they were just doing it for attention, as with the LeVay crowd. Any basis for real belief, however, completely eludes me.
Maybe someone just woke up one day and said, "I wonder what it's like to be smited. How do we make that happen?".
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