Blue Moo...Wait, That's No Moon

As is often the case, I will not get to see the Watchmen movie for some time, probably long after it comes out on DVD. Still, I have internet access, and having read the book, I don't particularly fear spoilers. As such, I've done a lot of reading on what people think about the movie. This has led to what must be one of the most amusing discoveries I've made about the American population in a long time.

America gets all freaked out about seeing at a man's winkee.

Seriously, I have heard more about Dr. Manhattan's glowing blue sidekick than all the other parts of the movie combined. People are seriously disturbed by the fact that he walks around naked through a lot of the movie. Forget that it makes perfect sense that a super being who is gradually becoming disassociated with humanity in general would cease caring about such things as proper fashion choices or any of the myriad other reasons we choose to clothe ourselves. It's not pornographic...it's just a naked guy.

What really disappointed me was how often I would hear these disgusted comments from people in the same breath as "How awesome was it that [insert female starlet] was naked", or even better, "I thought the excessive violence was overdone, but acceptable in the context". It's all good that a dude takes a meat cleaver to the head over and over or some girl gets naked, but having to see a man's junk is a traumatic event. Remember kids - violence and objectifying women is okay. Just don't go around looking at some guy's piece.



I guess what I don't understand is where the trauma is. I mean, it's a naked dude. So &#%$ing what. I'm going to go out on a limb and say that at least 50% of us have seen male genitalia, and given the fact that people seem to continue having children, that's probably a pretty low estimate. Seeing a penis on a movie screen is not going to cause a worldwide panic, lead to rioting in the streets, or cause anyone to catch "the gay".

Not even on IMAX, although I will defer that it might be a little intimidating seeing one that's roughly the size of a small car.