Of Course, If Wearing a Fez Is Involved, I'm In

Can someone explain to me what the hell goes on in "lodges"? It seems like every town I live in has a couple of these things, and I never know what they're for. I can't recall ever seeing anyone going into or coming out of one, so all I've got to go on is their reader boards boasting some band playing or spaghetti dinner. This is not much to go on.

I started rooting aroung, and their websites aren't adding a lot of information. Apparently, they do things, and they represent other...things. Here, let me give you an example. This is the mission statement from the Fraternal Order of Eagles website (which may have the most Bond-villianesque URL ever):

The Fraternal Order of Eagles, an international non-profit organization, unites fraternally in the spirit of liberty, truth, justice, and equality, to make human life more desirable by lessening its ills, and by promoting peace, prosperity, gladness and hope.

Huh. So they are...fraternal. Oh, and they enjoy truth, justice, liberty, equality, and seem to dislike...ills I guess. Okay. So that means that they...I mean, clearly what they do is...nope, I got nothin'.

So I figure maybe the problem is that I'm looking at the wrong lodge. I mean, sure the Eagles had a hut near my old apartment, but it's not like I've heard any conspiracy theories about them. I decided to set my site on a bigger target and see what I could learn about the Masons.

Having looked up the Grand Lodge of Michigan and found just as mysterious a vision statement (it's like the other one, with a shout out to God), I decided to check them out in WikiPedia. If I'm reading it correctly, it's basically a group of people (menfolk, specifically) who have come together and follow a bunch of rules because...well, they just do. I'm sure there's more to it, but I'll be damned if I can figure out what. It's almost like a bunch of guys were sitting around one day and said, "You know, I enjoy church and all, but there just aren't enough rules for me to follow. I wish I had a place where I could gather with other men and come up with a bunch of policies that others would have to follow if they wanted to join us. We could make them go through an elaborate initiation ceremony and everything. Who's with me?"

Seems like a lot to go through for a little bluegrass and "All-you-can-eat Fish Fry" night, but hey, who am I to judge, right?